Shared Parenting: Can We Make It Work?

Divorce can be difficult for all parties, especially the children. As a parent, you want what's best for your children, but as a human being, you do not want to be stepped on or taken advantage of. It’s a fine line most parents need to walk.

Taking advice from friends is not always the best way to do things. You could find out how to hire family lawyers in Melbourne, those that will keep you and your children foremost in mind when dissolving your marriage. You might consider shared parenting options, creating a more loving environment for your children during this difficult time.

What is Shared Parenting?

Shared parenting is more than the total time allotted to each parent with their children. There are parents who may only see their children once a week or a few times a month for whatever reason. However, the meaning of shared parenting goes beyond time.

Sharing parenting duties on a daily basis, as you would if you were still a couple, is what this type of parenting is striving for. You will need to discuss anything that impacts the children and not only major life events.

Possible Co-parenting Discussions:

This is a partial list of what parents need to consider discussing when co-parenting their children. The list grows and changes as the children do each day, week, month, and year. As a parent, you will be responsible for helping them through life until they are 18 years old, and beyond if they want the help.

This could extend to what the child eats. Are they going to be a vegetarian like one parent or consume meat like the other parent?

• What religion are the children going to be brought up in?
• Where will they attend school?
• What extracurricular activities will they participate in?
• What vaccination policies will they follow and by which pediatrician?

What Co-parenting is Not:

Co-parenting is not excluding the other parent for any reason. This includes child support matters, step-parents, grandparents, or any other type of parenting disagreement. You may not like your ex-partners way of life, or choices, but you are bound by parenting obligations to the child or children you both created.

If you suspect your ex of doing something harmful or illegal, you will need to notify your council immediately. Although it is difficult and can be unnerving as a shared parent, the authorities are the ones who will handle these issues. Do not attempt to intervene or prevent your ex from contacting your children. This will only make matters worse for you and your child.

Tremendous Work

Shared parenting is a tremendous amount of work. You will most likely bite your tongue on more than one occasion. You will need to remind yourself over and over that your children have a right to their other parent. Also, you will need to communicate with your ex that the children’s best interest is all that matters.

The act of sharing parenting duties goes by many names, ‘parallel parenting’, ‘co-parenting’, ‘involved parenting’, ‘equal parenting’, and ‘co-operative parenting.’ As long as both parents put the needs and well-being of the children first and foremost in their separation or divorce, the children should be alright.