How To Narrow Down Your Relationship Search

Finding the right relationship for you in today’s world is notoriously challenging and only a small minority of people ever really manage it. There’s just so much choice. 

That’s why it is essential to be purposeful about it. You want to ensure that you’re doing everything you can to whittle away at the enormous array of possibilities and find the type of people who are right for you. 

But how can you do that?

Refine Your Search Criteria

The first thing you can do is refine what you’re looking for. Try to avoid superficial searches and instead think more deeply about who you can connect with on a personal level. 

Incompatibilities usually show up in terms of lifestyle choices, personality traits and spiritual leanings. These are the main points of conflict, so you’ll want to understand what you want. However, it’s critical to look at the deepest level at the things that matter most to you, not what you think matters, but which actually doesn’t. 

Learn About Yourself

It’s also a good idea to take a personality test to learn more about yourself and who you are. These are a great way of understanding what motivates you and what matters to you. 

Personality tests take various forms, but they all make predictions about the types of relationships you should get into. Often, the tests themselves will provide you with a rundown of the core characteristics and personality traits that your partner should have. 

Reflect On Past Relationships

While it might be painful, it is also a good idea to reflect on past relationships. These can often be great guideposts towards what’s going to work in future relationships. If you can identify the core issues in these and what went wrong, you can often make better selections in the future. 

For example, you might discover something about yourself and how you react when you’re with a certain other person. You might also be able to identify issues with yourself and how you might want to avoid these in the future if you ever get into another relationship. 

Limit Time On Dating Apps

Ideally, you can find your next partner in real life, perhaps as part of a friendship group. However, even if you can’t, you still want to limit your time on dating apps. Setting a maximum time you can be on them is essential if you want to retain your peace and sanity. 30 minutes per day is usually enough. 

Look For Compatibility

Finally, you want to look for compatibility over raw chemistry. While the latter is important, it is often fleeting and doesn’t usually last. What you’re more interested in is whether you can get along with the other person and if they are the right choice for you. 

Sometimes, it can take several dates to figure this out. You think you know someone, but it can really take a lot of time to discover whether it is worth moving forward with them. Allowing a date to last all day is sometimes a good idea because it permits more exploration. 

 

 

 

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